Too Short

I started to re-do my resume this morning and then I went for lunch with a few friends. During lunch one of my old co-workers text messaged me that one of my previous co-workers had suffered from a brain aneurysm and they didn't expect her to make it through the day. If she does make it through the day she will be left in a permanent vegetative state. Then I happened to run into all of the girls that used to work at the office and they told me the same thing except that her family was probably going to be taking her off life support today. This lady is approximately 42ish. Just last year she became a grandmother, she bought a bike and went touring in BC, she had a career, she was vibrant and full of life. This is exactly why I am quitting. Life is too short and you never know what will happen or when. Of all the people that I used to work with she was the most healthy, never was sick and I wouldn't have expected for her to pass away or become terminally ill. I also read in the newspaper about a woman who was 29 had two children and passed away from cancer. Again why would I stay at a job I hate and have nothing to look forward too? IF I hated my job and I was at least making good money I would be able to save and still travel and buy a bike, yes mom I am one day going to buy a bike, it's not going to go away. I have nothing to look forward to right now, Dave that's it. He's great but I want a life to look forward to not just a man. So after lunch I finished the resume and faxed and emailed it off. SO please say a few prayers for me and my friends family as they go through this horrible time. Thanks. I know it sounds crazy but I feel like I'm 10 years behind. What have I done in the past 10 years to enjoy and live life. I don't know either than my career I don't feel like I've lived fully. I feel like finally I'm the person that I want to be. For so long I always blamed my weight on everything. That was my crutch. That was why I didn't have a boyfriend, people to hang out with, why I wasn't the popular girl. This year is different. I like my size to a certain degree, there will always be room for improvement but finally I am seeing that I am pretty close to being average size. So no more, if people don't like me it's their problem, not mine. I'm no longer as self conscious as I used to be. So I am living this year for me, I told Dave this was going to be a good year and he agreed, and it is, I am in charge of my own destiny and happiness and I am going to enjoy life and live it to the absolute fullest, no holding back!

Euphoria is Back

So I'm the kind of person that when something good happens to me I can't wait to tell everyone that I know. I wish that I wasn't so open about my life but it's like I want everyone to be as happy as I am. All last week I had barely heard from Dave so Friday night I text him and asked him if he had been busy. He said that he had been crazy busy and that they were sending him 400 miles north for another job for the next two days. I asked him if he was still going to be home Sunday night because originally he was going to come over Sunday night and then go to his courses on Monday. He said that he didn't know because they might just head straight to Lloyd so that they weren't driving really early in the morning. The disappointment you can imagine I felt. SO I took the plunge. I told him that I did want to see him and that I hadn't told him before but I was planning to go and work in the oilfield and I didn't know when I was leaving and I didn't know where I would be going or when I would be back. He responded saying that he would pull some strings and he would be at my place Sunday night. Then Saturday night he text me for awhile and then told me that he would text later. It was getting pretty late so I thought that he probably fell asleep but nope, 3 minutes before the hockey game ended I got some text from him. I don't know why I get so excited over him sending me a little text but I do. So then Sunday morning at 9am he sent a text telling me that he would be home that night, he didn't give a time though, so I expected himto be home late like he usually is, 11pmish. At 5pm I asked how his day was going. He said that he would be over in 45 minutes. Well I was so shocked, flustered and excited. Anyways he came over, I cooked which I have never done for him. Lobster, home made pierogies, and perch fish with peas. I had the lobster in the freezer because they had been cheap so I had bought them. They were actually the easiest thing to cook. Anyways he came, we had supper, talked over the meal. Then we had a shower, sorry if you don't want to hear, but a shower is kind of our thing. We always have one together. It kind of reminds me of my mom and dad because they always bath together to this day. I just think it's such an intimate thing and I like that it's something that I feel comfortable doing with him and he wants to do with me. Then of course we did stuff then we spent 45 minutes talking. He wants to sell me his bike. He told me that I can take my time and learn how to ride it and then when I am ready to buy it I can. We talked about the summer, travelling, my job, my trip. I had bought him a beanie toque in Vegas and he was totally psyched that I had got him it. I expected him to be happy but not that happy. He gave me a big kiss and put it on right away. That made the night. Just that he was appreciative that I thought of him on my trip was my gift from him. I love that he always talks about the future and not just about sex. The next time he comes over he wants me to teach him how to use the internet because he has no clue. It was funny he told me taht he didn't know how to get out of a site so he just hit the power button on the computer to get out. So that's my story. I must notify you all that I am changing my domain I will also email you but I am going to change it to jodethetoad@blogspot.com